Artifacts for living

When I was approached by Be the Change Boston to create a sculpture I was given full creative freedom over theme and execution. it was logical that it should be about domestic abuse. When I was attempting to flee my abusive home, I snuck out one day and went to Safe Passage. Safe Passage is an organization meant to help those experiencing abuse to leave and find safety and resources.  It was after my bone marrow transplant, and I was very weak and immune compromised. I had only recently been able to stop using a wheelchair and was reliant on others for most physical needs beyond walking and I had been able to drive myself to this appointment. At the appointment in a scared shaking voice, I found the courage to share what was happening and ask for help. Unfortunately, I was told that because I was not able to enter a shelter due to my health issues, they would not be able to help me. They told me to "go home and put up with it until you can't anymore and you can call us if you need to vent" This organization which was meant to help only made me feel more helpless and so I did just that. Accept that I never called them to "vent". Instead I worked to become stronger and about a year later fled in the night for fear for my life. This piece is inspired by my experience and a desire to help others. 

The process of creating this piece was a therapeutic one for me. Bending rebar with my bare hands using my body to pull and push to create the arches, learning to weld and seeing it come to life. Using tools which seemed scary to me before and feeling empowered by my own ability to wield their strength for my own uses.  Allowing it to evolve as it was made into what it needed to become. This piece became about the process of creating it. The physical act a form of healing showing myself that I am capable, that I am strong both physically and resiliently. After the transplant and the abuse my body had become a foreign object for me, weak and scarred from the traumas. I had spent so long being reliant on others for even the most basic physical tasks that pushing myself to create this work which relied so much on my body was healing for my sense of self. I reclaimed my body and my personal ideals on what I was capable of while creating this piece. 

The finished piece became a dwelling, two entrance points on either side to allow entrance without feeling trapped. Once inside there are two concrete benches across from one another which can comfortably seat 1-2 people each.  These benches are meant as a place for private conversation or solitude. On the inner panels are written words and phrases in over 20 languages. "I believe you", "stop saying you will go next time", "your children deserve to see you happy" and others. Some sourced from my own mind, things I wish I had been told, and others sourced through social media. I made a video of the piece in progress and asked other survivors online what they needed to hear. On the exterior are small ceramic tiles with QR codes for human rights organizations, shelters, lawyers, culturally specific organizations and more. I wanted to help those who were in the same moment I was...on the precipice of change, to feel heard, to feel not alone and hopefully feel inspired to seek help and then to provide resources for that help and more than one so that if one organization cannot assist that another one can.  I felt so helpless when I was told to go home and "put up with it till you can't anymore"... I wanted to provide enough resources so that anyone visiting the piece would be able to find someone to help them and not tell them to go home and put up with it.